January 4, 2014
There were two more tests for me to complete today. I don’t remember what the two tests were called, but I think they both determined how well I can strategize. In which case, I failed….quiet miserably.
The first test was done on the computer. Four items were displayed on the screen. Above each number was a different shape. I was to determine which shape was different out of the four. If I got the answer correct, a soft BING would ring. It kind of reminded me of a doorbell However, if I got the answer wrong, a sharp sound like a ERRRRRPP would shrill loudly. I got more of the annoying ERRRRR sounds than the BING sounds. Anyway, here is an example of one of the problems:
It was easy at first. In the problem above, I could tell that number four was the different item because the shape was bigger. Yet as time went on, it became much harder because ALL the shapes looked different from one another. My eyes started to twitch from the annoying ERRRRR sound. It was almost like being a rat in a maze, trying to find the cheese but only running into a dead end. I was so frustrated.
At the end of the test, Doc came in saying, “So I heard from the ERRRRR sound that you got quite a number of problems wrong.”
I turned from the computer and glared at him. As someone who fails quite often, I wasn’t happy to be reminded of something else I did poorly. I felt like saying, “No shit, Doc. Did you need your degree from Harvard to tell you that?” Instead I only muttered “Yeah…”
Some doctors have really big egos and can’t relate to their patients. Thankfully, my Doc isn’t one of them. He sat down beside me. “Mary, the point of these tests is to see what else needs to be worked on.” Doc then showed me a picture of my brain scan on the computer. The picture from a few months ago showed a big clump of brain waves, almost like a huge knot. When Doc showed me a more recent scan of my brain, the waves appeared straightened out.
While I was happy about the results, I felt my heart sank. Why was I still troubled with certain visual things especially when I graded papers? I told this to Doc, who wasn’t sure what I meant.
“You mean you confuse the operations systems?”
“Well I do sometimes mix up my addition with my multiplication sign. But it is more than that,” I replied.
Doc frowned. “Explain.”
“Sometimes I remember facts wrong. Like the problem 8 +7. I’ll say it is 13 instead of…of…” I don’t know why, but the brain blanked out. Why couldn’t I remember 8+7? I paused before I answered. Doc waited patiently.
“Fifteen!” I finally remembered the answer. Thank God! Although it was embarrassing, I’m glad Doc was able to see another issue I was having. These “brain freezes” seem to happen often. Sometimes I would lose my train of thought. For example, I was talking to a colleague about the teacher I work with. I was talking about her and I could not remember her name. The conversation went like this:
“I just feel so bad for Mrs…..Mrs…ummm…..” How embarrassing!
Doc said it could be a ‘contamination’ problems. In other words, yes, my brain could be remembering the facts wrong. This could indicate that something is wrong with the left temporal lobe. He didn’t go into any details. I’ll have to ask him more about it later. The good news is there is a brand new brain mapping program that will help ‘fix’ my temporal lobe. Doc wanted to try it out today but there wasn’t time.
Doc left the room and his assistant, Lilly, came in to give me the second test. This test I took was so confusing that I can’t even really explain it, but I’ll try.
Each question had “A” and “B”. Next to A and B were shapes. I had to tell Lilly the connection between A and B.
“What is the rule for the square to be in box B.” Lilly asked. I tried to say what was in box B, like ‘big, orange, square,” but Lilly said I had to give one answer…the right answer. As the questions got harder, there were many times that I had to say “I don’t know.”
I also don’t know how long it will take to resolve my visual issue. I only hope it will not take long….because if the school recognizes that I am miss-grading papers…I’m in deep shit.